Ok, so now admittedly I have an eating disorder. I suffered daily, pushed everyone away and was left alone with Ed. The thing is, I did not start out with eating disorder thoughts about weight and food, but now it was all I thought about after the program. As I had lost significantly MORE weight and mentally had come undone he was in control. I say he as in Ed, it was the approach used in “Life without Ed” mentioned in Chapter 3 (first blog). The theory is to separate yourself from your eating disorder. He is the abusive husband, boyfriend, everyone who left you or stopped loving you during your struggles. Once you can place the blame and release some of the anger at another – other than yourself – you CAN start to heal.
I wrote my “Declaration of Independence” to protest my plan and commitment to recovery. I had supporters sign and date my document and have it hanging in my room.